Apologies

What would you have me be?
I offer sincere apologies for all I lack
This path I walk locked in through my life
What would you have me say?
I offer all apologies for my misunderstanding
Unawareness caught up in ego and self
What else would you have me write?
Truths springing from thought and care
I offer all apologies for I don’t have the right
What would you have me be?
All I have are these apologies

Walking out into this sun lit day
Would but to feed my soul on the wonders of the universe
Warm of the light, inspiring, allowing me to create
In this sun, this light, love and care filling this journey
And with you, together, one, union
Yet happiness eludes
Why?

I would wish to be more like you
So easily amused, dancing my way through each day
Love filled moments leading to laughter and joy
Within me I find my nest of blame, everything is my fault
Choices I made causing pain to those I love
Essence of who I am leaving no real choice at all
I take on all the dark, all the pain, burning in shame
Freezing in the sun, choking on the ashes of mistake
Alone is all I am
All I manage to be
Why?

What would you have me be?
All I have are these apologies…

Steve ‘Easy’ Whitacre August 11, 2009

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